Last week we touched on priorities, values and responding to demands. Today I want to delve into the power of No and why I think you should use this often seen as a negative word more often. Here are just 3 powers No holds:
1. No sets boundaries! It is the tool in which we establish and maintain limits that protects our true self. No says, “This is who I am; this is what I value; this is what I will and will not do.” You should never lose yourself because people, society, family or friends have a certain expectation of you. You are YOU. You can’t afford to lose who you are, the world needs someone like YOU! We need No to set those limits which protect our choices.
2. No gives you the ability to be agents of your own limits. Can I be honest and speak to some of you (including myself): NO you don’t need another slice of cake, you can do without. NO you don’t need another drink Fred, you’re already drunk! NO you don’t need to buy that outfit, your bank accounts been screaming. Saying No to yourself could save your life, finances, relationships and future. Mastering the art of self-discipline will bless you.
3. No gives you back your personal power of choice. It’s amazing how much people will ask and expect of you. Some will even demand from you, the cheek of it! No protects you from the many who feel entitled. You are a limited resource, stop giving people everything you have, and that includes time! Further to that, you should never make decisions solely based on what others want of you. No tells others your standards, what you will and won’t do. No draws the line. Yes we stay respectful, yes we stay considerate, but no we don’t make decisions to please or satisfy others.
‘No is an instrument of integrity and a shield against exploitation. It often takes courage to say. It is hard to receive. But setting limits sets us free.’ – Judith Sills
I want you to try it – try using this word more often. It is so important and will impact your life in so many ways. Keeping a healthy balanced life depends on this simple word,knowing what to say No to. It’s not always easy, I mean unless you’re just plain miserable you won’t get much joy in delivering No’s, but believe me you’ll feel a sense of relief once you start saying No to the right things.
From one discovering soul to another – continue living out your true-self, staying true to what’s true to you.